Happy wife…
When I woke up this morning, I was so excited to write about investment strategies and my thoughts about 401K’s, the differences between a traditional IRA and a Roth IRA, etc. but as the day wore on, my heart moved me toward thoughts about Kim and the things that make our marriage work. God knows, I am far from the perfect husband, but I do my best and I try hard each day to anticipate her needs, just as Kim tries to do the same for me. We each have our selfish moments; mine are mostly on the golf course with my buddies, laughing at the expense of someone doing or saying something stupid, drinking beer and smoking cigars, all in innocent fun. Kim is literally a better person than I am, with fewer moments of self-indulgence, mostly thinking about the needs of others or shopping for Lyla and Emmy (but then she does get so much joy out of that!).
There are certainly countless times (each and every day, truth be told) that I drive her crazy. But we try to listen and try even harder to remember the things that really set each other off and make it a point to avoid those things. Some of you are still in the early stages of your relationships, so this may not resonate yet, meanwhile, others are starting the second decade of marriage, so you know exactly what I mean. All this to say, your marriage is the single most important relationship in your life and you get out of it what you put into it. Make the investment each and every day, and don’t take this investment for granted. Unlike your 401K at work where you set aside 10% of your monthly paycheck and ignore the performance, visiting Fidelity or Vanguard or Janus Fund once a year, you need to scrutinize this investment regularly.
There are just a few simple rules to create a happy marriage:
Be comfortable but not complacent, and make sure your spouse is just as comfortable
Follow thru on all the small promises.
Don’t make your spouse become your parent
Express love and affection daily
Be humble enough to apologize
Discuss your needs and wants often. No matter how intuitive or smart, your spouse is not a mind reader
Prioritize time together
Do things that make you happy individuals
Be a resilient team
Do not avoid conflict. Learn to fight smarter
It’s ok to be apart part of the time as long as you’re together when and where it matters
Agree on the big priorities
